One and only
by kging42
Summary: Alternate universe, pre 10.5, songfic. Rose sings to herself about the longing and pain she is feeling about having lost the Doctor and never getting to hear him say he loved her back.


I'll start right out by saying that I own nothing. Not Doctor who or the Adele song you will find in here as well. I really wish they hadn't gotten rid of Rose/Billie Piper. No companion can hold a candle to her.

So this story takes place in the alternate universe and kind of takes a turn from what really happened. I was going to put in how she ended up pregnant but I just wanted to focus on the pain and longing she was feeling and the joy that would come. Also this is pre 10.5.

"It's not too late Rose you could still get rid of it" Jackie Tyler said trying to be helpful and comfort her crying daughter.

"How could you even say that!" Rose shouted back at her mother. " I know I'll never see him again but at least I'll have a part of him with me always"

" I hate to see you like this though Rose"

"I know mom"

Rose Tyler had found out, just today, that she was two and a half month pregnant. Having been sick the whole six weeks she had been in this new universe her mother finally dragged her to the doctor's office. Even though she had tried to convince her mother that it was nothing probably just stress from all that had happened. How wrong she ended up being.

Crying both in happiness for the new life growing inside her and in sadness because the Doctor would never get to share this happiness of see his child grow. But beyond the emotions coursing through her she worried about what this pregnancy would be like and what her child would be like as her or she got older. Would the baby be smart like the Doctor? Would it have her eyes, his hair? She didn't know and couldn't wait to find out.

When Pete had found out her bought her all sorts of baby things and put them in a room right next to what was now Rose's room. Sitting in that room now just staring at these things, the crib, and the changing table. She began to just think about what the Doctor would say if he were here. What he would he would think of the space themed room painted in dark blues with stars and moon all around the walls. It seemed almost cruel to her that Mickey and Pete should chose to paint the room like this. It seemed as though they were taunting her with what she could never have again, but knew that her baby would love it.

She decided it was time she get up, when the baby got her she couldn't just lay around being grumpy and moody she would have to be a mom, and she would be a great mother.

Starting to put things away the words of a song she had heard once upon a time started coming back to her and she felt compelled to start singing it both to her baby and to the Doctor even if she knew he would never hear it.

"You've been on my mind, I grow fonder every day, lose myself in time. Just thinking of your face, God only knows, why it's taken me so long to let my doubts go. You're the only one I want"

Rose knew these words weren't hers to start but felt that the words of this song came straight from her soul and explained everything she was feeling. She could feel her eyes start to water up but held back the tears there would be no more crying for things she couldn't change she had to grow up.

"I don't know why I'm scared, I've been here before. Every feeling, every word, I've imagined it all, you never know if you never try, to forgive your past and simply be mine"

She had been in love before but never like this. She had realized rather slowly, maybe to slowly that the Doctor was never going to let go of his past. That he would never forgive himself for what he did even if the rest of the universe forgave him he would still never be able to let it go.

"I dare you to let me be your, your one and only. Promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms. So come on and give me a chance to prove that I'm the one who can walk that mile until the end starts."

But most of all she wished that they had had more than just that one night together, that they had had time to truly express their feeling for each other. Rose knew she would have told him she loved him a million times and mean it every time. Even if he never said it back she would have been happy to just stay with him and love him. But that probably all would have had to change when the Doctor realized she was pregnant. Rose had a million ideas of how it from sweeping her off her feet and kissing her to freaking out and abandoning her back in London.

"If I've been on your mind you hang on every word I say. Lose yourself in time at the mention of my name; will I ever know how it feels to hold you close? And have you tell me whichever road I choose you'll go."

Rose wondered often if he thought of her as often as she thought of him. She prayed he wasn't alone, Rose knew he needed someone to hold his hand and follow him to those bizarre and beautiful planets that his companions never would have seen without him. She wondered if he talked about her to his new companion or if she was forgotten.

"I don't know why I'm scared 'cause I've been here before. Every feeling, every word, I've imagined it all, you'll never know if you never try to forgive your past and simply be mine."

"I dare you to let me be your, your one and only. Promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms. So come on and give me a chance to prove I am the one who can walk that mile until the end starts"

Why did he have to draw it out when he said goodbye? Why couldn't he just come out and say that he loved me, despite being scared. The Doctor knew we would never see each other again I just wanted to hear him say it. No one really wants to hear " Quite right too" after they've just told someone they love them. But Rose could understand that he was scared because if he didn't say it than he could deny his feeling and not be stuck with the terrible pain and longing she was feeling.

"I know it ain't easy giving up your heart. I know it ain't easy giving up your heart.  
Nobody's perfect(I know it ain't easy giving up your heart)Trust me, I've learned it. Nobody's perfect(I know it ain't easy giving up your heart)Trust me, I've learned it. Nobody's perfect(I know it ain't easy giving up your heart)Trust me, I've learned it. Nobody's perfect(I know it ain't easy giving up your heart)Trust me I've learned it."

"So I dare you to let me be your, your one and only. I promise I'm worthy to hold in your armsSo come on and give me a chance To prove I am the one who can walk that mile. Until the end starts"

"Come on and give me a chance To prove I am the one who can walk that mile. Until the end starts"

Rose finished the song the tears coming now even though she had tried her hardest to hold them back. She may never see the Doctor again but she would be happy with her little baby time lord or lady. There was no need for her to be sad anymore as the Doctor said once she needed to have a fantastic life even if he wasn't in it anymore, besides she still had her family and all her memories of him and this child would hear every one of them as often as possible. Those stories would be the only connection this to its father so she would have to make the baby know through those tales of their adventures what a great man the Doctor was.

-Seven and a half months later-

Eighteen hours of labor that's how long Rose had to wait to meet her beautiful little boy. Born at the Torchwood facility here in Rose's new home universe, because he was part alien and like his father had two hearts. Nineteen inches long and weighting sixteen pounds ten ounces, he was perfect in Rose's eyes, already with a head full of messy brown hair and her hazel eyes, she knew he would grow up to be a great man like his father.

"Well hello Loki Jackson Tyler, Mommy already loves you and I know daddy does too."

I want to explain the name because it makes sense in my head. She named him Loki after the Doctor because she doesn't know his real and Loki seemed to fit because the Doctor was always getting into trouble and causing mischief. So Loki seemed to fit to name the Doctor's child when your naming the kid after the doctor.

Please review and leave me some love criticism welcome. Much love thanks for reading.


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